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Friday, October 27, 2006

Train me? Teach me? Help me!

Oh wow. I cannot BELIEVE it has been so long since I blogged. It's all dadgum dial-up's fault. Accessing my own blog is painfully slow enough . . . it's even more difficult to carve out time to read the thoughts of others! I know I am missing out on so much. Forgive! Forgive! Hopefully these dial-up days will soon end.

Anyway, something that weighs HEAVILY on my mind these days is the subject of discipline. Gone are the days when a stern "NO" could stop D in her tracks. Now she seems to delight in that word. Rather than allowing herself to be redirected, she seems determined to find the next no-no that she knows will get Mommy's attention.

Here is the main problem in our home. Kyle comes from a home where the praises of Dobson are sung: a spanking-friendly, training-oriented approach to parenting - to put it nicely. But ya'll! I am just not down with it! It goes against my heart in the same way Ezzo's Babywise did. But Kyle feels strongly that stern punishments for misbehavior are what are needed to create a child who is pleasant to be around.

Another concern - I am woefully awful about doling out negative consequences. A huge weakness in my life is that I hate for anyone to be unhappy or displeased with me. This was a problem when I was teaching - I had a hard time following through with consequences - and it's a problem in relationships - I have a hard time speaking the truth when it needs to be spoken.

So, my lovely readers, talk to me! I would love to hear your thoughts on how Kyle and I can come to an agreement on approaches to discipline, as well as any book recommendations you want to share. I welcome thoughts from everyone - parents of kids of all ages as well as those without children.